By Danielle Utianski

What the Black Belt means to me and why it is important for me to achieve it.
November 2007

    A black belt is more than just a piece of fabric to tie around my waist. It represents the three years of sweat, diligence, and work put into to my martial arts and life training. I think that the most amazing part of this journey is that it never ends. I am a firm advocate now, that the martial arts is a way of life and plan on using that black belt to inspire others to commit themselves to a goal and follow through with their commitments. Having had Shihan and Ma’am both take me under their wings, I am standing here before you a different person. Since February 9, 2005, I can tell you that I feel more confident in my ability to stand up for myself on the street, more confident in my demeanor, and have an overall different perspective to how I approach life, in general.

    “Goals we set are Goals we get,” was the first affirmation ever taught to me at Moti Horenstein’s Mixed Martial Arts and it, all alone, is one reason why it is important to me to achieve a black belt. It is affirmations such as these that have allowed me to grow into a more responsible, and dependable independent young adult. I am constantly setting and resetting my goals and learning to recognize my achievements. I used to belittle the things I did, and the training I have received has given me a more optimistic approach to learning and living, which I now believe is essential to having a happy and successful life. For this, I want to say thank you.

    My appearance, the confidence and life skills I have earned have helped me in accepting who I am and appreciating the way I am. It is blatantly obvious that when I started the martial arts, I had an array of complexes about my weight and the way I look and have struggled with that for many years. I have explored ways to make myself happier about the way I looked that have including with some crash diets and other things that I am not proud of, it was not until I got the coaching from Shihan and Ma’am on how to go about making these changes in a slower (but healthier manner) that I have been on my way to being more confident. Though there are still things I want to change about myself, I have become more mature in that I am not willing to harm myself in order to do so. In getting my black belt, I hope to send a message and set the example to other kids, especially young girls, that a healthy lifestyle is the way to go; moreover, that a confidence in yourself is more important than how others judge.  This was proven to be true, when answering a prospect’s e-mail yesterday with Shihan, to a young teenage girl struggling with issues concerning weight and appearance. It is such a prevalent issue, especially with the standards proposed by this society, and it is so important for kids to have a role model and a lending ear for issues such as these. Having seen the support Shihan, Melissa, and recently Miss Katie have given me; I want to be A PART of that support team. 

    “Like it, Love it, and Want more of it.” This proves to be true in every aspect of the Martial Arts for me. I am constantly finding myself having a yearning to learn a new weapon, or a new kick, and watch intently with the hopes of gaining a greater understanding of a take down. The Martial Arts has proven to be a challenge for me, and a challenge that I have grown to love. It is common for a parent to come up to the front desk and say to me with a slight smile, “you’re a lifer,” and I, with a huge grin on my face reply, “and happy to be one!” The skills, drills, and people you meet in the Martial Arts have strongly and positively affected the way I have matured over the years. Growing up, I was never able to participate in after school activities because money was really tight, we were constantly moving, and to be honest, I didn’t have very many friends. I always found that I got along a lot better with adults and my teachers as opposed to fellow students: I was bullied. I am a bit eccentric and a free thinker, and being a part of the Martial Arts has allowed me to embrace this about myself and be more confident.

    The black belt to me also represents health. Since age 7, I have struggled with over stressing myself, getting myself very frustrated, and an active history of migraines. Migraines, that for the past 8 or 10 months, have been non-existent. As I said, I approach life differently and while I still get frustrated with everything on my plate, I outlet the frustration in different ways. Like hitting the bag, practicing a form, or making a list of thins I can do to rectify a situation. I believe that I think about the things I do more before I act. This is beneficial especially with the pressures teenagers face with drugs and alcohol today. At homecoming this year, for example, I volunteered to be the designated driver and ended up to taking care of a girl who had way too much to drink and was left my the people she came to the party with. I am not saying that I haven’t made wrong decisions, but as time has progressed with me in the Martial Arts, I find that I am making more of the right ones.

    It is difficult for me, to express into words, what MHMMA means to me. I really do feel like it is a family, and have devoted so much time and energy into the past three years there. While working there has taught and insurmountable amount about business, and taking classes has taught me a great deal about defending and protecting and taking care of myself, that family element has made everybody open to talk about anything. That is very comforting.

    It is true, that there are a never ending amount of meanings that the black belt has and why it is important to me. Overall though, all of these reasons paint one big picture: that anything is possible with the right attitude, the right drive, and the right coach. With all of the problems, I mean obstacles; I have been faced with in the past seventeen years, I have been fortunate enough to fall in the hands of this academy. For every change I have made in my life, for ever opinion I have formed, every move I have learned, and very person I have met; this is what the black belt means. It is every goal that is ever set and met, and it is the never ending force that will lead to success.  I feel like a different person than I was 3 years ago, and a lot of that I owe to Shihan Moti, Melissa, my parents and sisters, of course, Miss Katie, and my friends (who have changed undoubtedly throughout the years). In essence, you are the reason it is important to me. Whenever I lost hope, or was discouraged, you are the one’s to get me back on track and are, in a large part, the reason it is important for me to be not only a physical black belt, but mentally… and to be a role model to others.

    I am honestly in disbelief writing this essay, as it is a surreal feeling to be this close to a black belt. Looking back, the time has flown by, and I am excited and eager to see what the future holds. Thanks again for everything you guys have given me.